The toilet is clogged at work, and you know what? I’m not unclogging it!
Everyone thinks I should do it. They think it was my fault because I’m the one who discovered it. But it wasn’t me! Actually, the only one safe from blame should be me.
I peed in there and when I flushed, nothing went down. The toilet paper just swirled around near the surface of the water. Whatever had clogged it was obviously there before I walked in.
The thing is, the thing is, there’s only two people who could be the culprit. One of them knows they’re guilty. One of them dropped a turd that clogged up the office toilet. I know it was a turd because that person didn’t have the decency to clean their skid marks.
ARE YOU READING THIS? THIS IS THE NASTY STUFF I HAVE TO DEAL WITH AT THIS OFFICE.
One of my co-workers is keeping silent while I am accused of something I didn’t do. That person better step up. They better step up and grip the plunger and undo what they did, because I DID NOT put on a dress and heels and pearls this morning to come play Plumber.
Now it’s just a battle of wills and bladders. Eventually someone will have to use the restroom so badly that they will be willing to fix the toilet. I will dehydrate today if I have to, because that person will NOT be me!