dear important paper…

Dear Important Paper,

You are a very important paper and it is very important that I not lose you, so I have put you in a very important place.  You are so secure in your hiding place that no one will be able to find you.  Not even me.

No seriously — I can’t find you.  I did such a good job hiding you, that I don’t even remember doing it.  I’m just assuming that I did based on the information I have, which is 1) you are important and 2) you are missing.

I have checked all the usual “important paper” places — the refrigerator door, the bottom of my purse, and that giant stack of crap sitting in the guest room — all to no avail.  Logically the only thing to do in this situation is to go to sleep.  I know it won’t help me find you, but everyone knows sleep > paper.  It’s just the cold hard truth.

Love, Me

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